A Blog About Making Culture
Great Moments in Advertising
April 5, 2004
About 250 years ago, Josiah Wedwood invented the concept of the celebrity endorsement. A scant two and a half centuries later, his clever marketing strategy has reached its ominous and terrifying nadir. If I understand correctly, the worst idea in the entire history of advertising was recently unveiled: Bob Dylan selling lingerie. Bob Dylan and lacy underthings, together at last.
Let's pause for a moment to appreciate that image.
Now, I'm not a fan of Dylan, but I'm not his harshest critic either. I don't know a lot of his work, but crazy musical geniuses from Minnesota who change their names and tend to alienate their fans are generally okay with me. So I'm not biased against the man himself.
Nor do I have an issue with "selling out". I think it's a false concept to begin with, and certainly there's no harm in someone deciding to endorse a product for money after 40 years of never having done so. It's about time, I say. Go make some money.
But no, the problem here is his choice of product. The company he's endorsed has, I kid you not, a trademark on the phrase "very sexy". That is to say: Very Sexy™
The problem is, Bob Dylan is not very sexy, let alone Very Sexy™. He's not the least bit sexy. He's not even the opposite of sexy, like the late Strom Thurmond was. Bob Dylan lives in a world without sexy. It's a happy place, don't get me wrong, full of poetry and old hippies and the sort of people who still argue about things like acoustic-versus-electric. But friends, where there is Bob Dylan, there is no sexy.
Of course now I'll get email from people who've seen Dylan's son and think his son is sexy. And that clears up a big point for scientists; We have definitive proof that someone who occupies a vacuum of sexiness can help create a human who is arguably sexy. That's good to know, and it's not like Jane Goodall was going to be able to dig up that answer in a jungle in Gabon.
So this is all good news for those diehard Wallflowers fans, I suppose. But it's BAD NEWS FOR CAPITALISM. There is nowhere left to go now; The well of incredibly horrible advertising ideas is running dry.
I mean, you could wait until there's the inevitable "Running Man" show where execution becomes a reality TV series, and you could place ads for sneakers during the broadcast. But that would just be in bad taste, and bad taste's been done.
No, the worst thing you could do is have the people from Planet Unsexy come and start spreading their word to the rest of us. We'll not be able to look at a saucy merrywidow or a flirty pair of stockings without fearing their zombie invasion. The thong meme will stop spreading. Then, the earnest folk-rockers will come for the rest of us, whether we're frolicking in sliky underthings or not.
Unfortunately, the ad was created in-house by Limited Brands' own team, so I can't publicly shame an outside company for suggesting the idea and merely blame the retailer for giving approval. Indeed it becomes a bit clearer, with some research, that perhaps some inside the company were leery of unleashing this powerful force of anti-sexiness. You see, nearly every story about the unfortunate promotion mentions that the idea to draft Dylan came Limited Brands CEO Leslie Wexner himself. Nobody's that anxious to give their CEO credit for an idea unless it's a horrendously bad one.
Despite the potential misgivings of some people involved in the worst campaign in advertising history, somehow this travesty has been inflicted upon the world. It's a grim day for the advertising industry, my friends. And it's a grim day for sexy supermodels.
Previously: Content Targetting for Personal Ads
sxxxy.org | News For Perverts
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I’m not sure why this has caused such an uproar all of a sudden; this commercial has been out in a slightly different version for at least six months. The previous incarnation didn’t actually show Dylan, but his somewhat creepy song was still the soundtrack.
It’s also not the first time unsexy has been used to sell sexy. (I can’t believe I just wrote that sentence.) Think of the Calvin Klein campaign in the lat ’90s featuring underage models and a faux-pedophile photographer in some basement rec room. Or Helmut Lang’s rather unattractive black-and-white photos of models in semi-constructed clothes and black rubber gas masks. Perhaps those ads were sexy to some narrow segment of the fashion-buying public (pedophiles and rubber fetishists, specifically), but for most of us they were ugly and tasteless.
Bill Seitz
Perhaps it was a vanity ad, Les telling the world “we really unsexy guys are kinda sexy, dammit!”
Or maybe Les finds Bob sexy. Like Diller (Barry, not Phyllis) lusting after Luke Perry. Only different…
Anil
Well, sure rock stars have always used music to get chicks without actually having to be sexy themselves. I mean, that’s what rock and roll’s all about, and it’s certainly fine if an unsexy guy provides the background music.
But they put Mr. Unsexy in the ad! With the hotties! Oh the humanity!
Rafe
While I agree with you wholeheartedly on the unsexiness of Bob Dylan, I think the ad is great. Creepy song. Bad angel. Bob Dylan as lecherous folk singing cowboy dirty old man or something. It works for me, although I can’t put my finger on why.
John Dowdell
I’m not sure what all the “lack of connection” uproar is about either. It’s like they never saw the Dylan-in-lingerie bootleg or something…?
Karan
You are absolutely right. Even if they picked Dylan just for the song, they shouldn’t show him, especially with that came hither look. Sex appeal…not.
Drew
who cares about folk music. American Idol is where its at.
Paul Watson
OT: I know Yusuf Islam aka Cat Stevens changed his name and alienated fans but did Bob do so too?
And my sister and a female co-worker think Bob is very sexy. Apparently his voice and artistic torment drive them wild. :-D
mathew
let me chip in here and say that my mother finds bob dylan attractive as well. i know this because after i saw this commercial i let out an utteral groan (followed by a ‘first the song, now his face?’) to which my mother replied ‘what? he’s sexy.’
i think the sex part of bob dylan is in his voice and it somehow overpowers a woman’s sensibilities.
Vidiot
OT: I know Yusuf Islam aka Cat Stevens changed his name and alienated fans but did Bob do so too?
Yup, the pride of Hibbing, Minnesota was born Robert Allen Zimmerman.
silly
Well… You’re writing about it and so is the mainstream press. So it worked, didn’t it.
Anil
Sure, I’m writing about it. But there’s no mention of the actual brand he’s endorsing on this page. Curious, no?
dj
did you see the NY Post headline “sold out for a thong?”
Akash
Well, on the bright side, at least Dylan wasn’t enlisted to be the next “I’ve Got the Urge” model for Herbal Essences.
daisymaeclover
Dylan’s sexy, in an elfin sort of way. An elderly elf, that’s true, a “he walks by night” kinda elf but still sexy. It’s the voice and it’s the words. And it’s the turned-in toes in Rumplestiltskin boots.
Liz Fine
Haha! I saw this Victoria Secret ad last night and my first thought was,
“Why the hell didn’t they use Dylan’s cute son, Jacob!”
I could care less about the bras and panties, give me some real eye candy.
Erehwon
If only there was some way to systematically exterminate everyone who isn’t conventionally attractive. Then we wouldn’t have to deign to look upon them at any time, much less in TV commercials!
Adam Rice
The well of incredibly horrible advertising ideas is running dry.Considering the Subservient Chicken (which apparently dropped at the same time), I must disagree.
David Tiley
He’s singing I’m sick of love. Anyone who thinks Dylan is sexy is not in the target demographic for this particular selection of bras and panties.
weird weird weird. The object of the thing is not to get people talking about it but to create an association. Oh look, bulgy satin stuff, must be a sexy angel, will buy NOW… no. Doesn’t work.
Alex
It took me six viewings of the ad to notice Bob Dylan. :-) What I’d like to know, why wasn’t Rod Stewart used? Disregarding the fact that he isn’t an oil painting and has an awful voice, this is his heartland. I bet his agent is perusing the ‘situations vacant’ ads right now.
Megan
I think there’s something wrong with the thinking behind this advertisement. I saw it several times and wondered, “man, who is that creepy guy, and why is he watching girls in their underwear?” I would consider myself to be part of the target audience of this ad, being a female in my early 20s… and I actually had to look up that it was Bob Dylan. So their celebrity endorsement didn’t even work on me!
Smitty
As long as there are no ads with him actually wearing the stuff, I can live with it.
Peter
He’s singing I’m sick of love. Anyone who thinks Dylan is sexy is not in the target demographic for this particular selection of bras and panties.
weird weird weird. The object of the thing is not to get people talking about it but to create an association. Oh look, bulgy satin stuff, must be a sexy angel, will buy NOW… no. Doesn’t work.
Gal
Sorry, but I find Bob Dylan very sexy. OK, I am a fan, so I find his music sexy too. I am 30, and sorry, I do not find Brad Pitt o Leonardo DiCaprio sexy. Anyway, if they would do the advertising you think we will buy more underwear? I do not think so. I have a differente taste? Maybe. Really, I do not understand what all this is going on. Paul Newman, Robert Redford… are still sex symbols for many woman, even in his last movies, and…? Sorry, but I prefer Bob Dylan. Anyway, it’s just an advertising, and he is not pretending being Casanova. I like the advert because it’s something different, the images are pretty and the music is great. And, let me says that Dylan does not care about are coments, you know, he just keep doing well in his job and, he you know his carrier, you know that “he knows too much to argue or to just”. Bob, te queremos!
Lingerie Girl
Why not? Bob Dylan and Victoria’s secret - sounds great. And it must be beneficial for both of them :)) Jessica
Rebecca Razavi
I have the sexiest picture of Bob on my computer (taken in the early 90s I think) which every night i kiss before taking a 500-page book on his lyrics (Dylan’s Visions of Sin) to bed with me along with one or another of his CDs, records, or tapes and just lie there thinking that if he were here I’d lay him right across my big brass bed….Victoria Secret has his number!
Adrienne
Oh wow, I’ll never forget the day I found out there would be a Dylan CD at VS. Yes, I was there as soon as the store opened. This is by far my favorite mix CD. Has so many emotions. I might be the only one who listens to it almost everyday (the other days its another dylan cd). I know I’m kinda late but I had no idea he was actually in a commercial (I dont watch much TV) So tonight I was wondering why VS and Dylan would actually do this. Did some research and found out he was in a commerical. Wow was I suprised. Yeah, I’m still a bit confused. But Dylan is a poet who gushes mystery, sexiness, and love within his lyrics. This seems to me the best combination to me. Poetry is sexy, panties are sexy. True alot of young people dont even know who he is. But the VS people were sure suprised when at 17 year old was uber excited to get her hands on that CD
Cristina
Bob Dylan is very sexy
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